Author: Bob Reddy

Thanksgiving celebrated around the Diocese

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Staff Report – Florida Catholic

12/4/2018

The Thanksgiving holiday brings people together for a meal with the opportunity to thank the Lord for all that has been provided during the past year.

Bishop Frank J. Dewane helps serve a hot meal at the Knights of Columbus Council 3358 in Sarasota for the traditional Thanksgiving Dinner for the community.

While Thanksgiving is typically a celebration of the family, many take the opportunity to help those in need, whether it is through bags of food or offering a hot meal, the outreach throughout the Diocese is impressive.

The Young Vincentians from Cardinal Mooney Catholic High School in Sarasota delivered more than 1,000 pounds of food to Bethesda House, a Catholic Charities program for people impacted by HIV/AIDS.

Guadalupe Social Services of Catholic Charities in Immokalee and the Judy Sullivan Family Resource Center in Naples both offered baskets of food to hundreds of needy families. This included food that would not only be used for the holiday itself but could feed a family of four for up to a week.

One mother, who received a gift basket from the Judy Sullivan Center, noted that the food was much appreciated as it would allow her to provide a special meal for her two children at Thanksgiving. “I’m just so grateful to everyone who provided the food. It means so much to my children too.”

The St. Joseph Food Pantry handed out more than 1,200 bags of food Thanksgiving Week in Bradenton.

At St. Joseph Parish in Bradenton, volunteers handed out more than 1,200 bags of food in three days. Meanwhile, the Young Vincentians from Cardinal Mooney Catholic High School in Sarasota delivered more than 1,000 pounds of food to Bethesda House, a Catholic Charities program for people impacted by HIV/AIDS. At St. Columbkille Parish in Fort Myers, more than 120 turkeys and other items were donated to St. Margaret Parish in Clewiston and St. Joseph the Worker Parish in Moore Haven.

Volunteers at St. Columbkille Parish in Fort Myers load turkeys for delivery to parishes in Clewiston and Moore Haven just before Thanksgiving.

Bishop Frank J. Dewane was in Sarasota on Thanksgiving Day when he joined the Knights of Columbus Council 3358 for the traditional Thanksgiving Dinner for the community. The Bishop gave the opening blessing and helped on the food line. This annual event is in its third decade and this year provided about 600 hot meals for many people who have nowhere else to go on Thanksgiving. An additional 200 meals were delivered to the homeless in the area. Earlier, Bishop Dewane celebrated Mass at Our Lady of the Angels Parish in Lakewood Ranch.

In Immokalee, the faithful of St. John the Evangelist Parish in Naples offered “Thanksgiving in the Park” which provided more than 2,000 meals. More than 100 volunteers helped prepare the meal and then serve the food on Thanksgiving Day.

Several other parishes had Thanksgiving dinner for the faithful, including at St. Peter the Apostle Parish in Naples which served about 300.

These were just a few examples of what took place throughout the Diocese of Venice Thanksgiving week.

Honoring Our Veterans: More than 1,500 attend Veterans Day Mass

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Bob Reddy – Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

It was 100 years ago, on the 11th hour of the 11th day of 1918, when the guns fell silent and horror that was World War I was over. Each year Nov. 11 is set aside to honor all veterans, both living and deceased, who have served their country to defend the freedoms that are cherished to this day.

For the ninth year, the Diocese of Venice has celebrated a Catholic Veterans Day Mass at Sarasota National Cemetery which drew more than 1,500 people.

Paul Zielinski, who served in Korea with the U.S. Army for two years, stood tall and proud as he sang during the National Anthem just prior to the Mass. A member of the choir at Our Lady of Lourdes Parish in Venice, he said it is a privilege and honor to attend the Catholic Mass at the National Cemetery each year.

“I am proud to have served and proud that the Catholic Church celebrates and honors its veterans each year,” said Zielinski, who has attended the annual Mass for the past three years. “I will be coming back every year as long as I am able.”

Another veteran who enjoys the Catholic Mass each year is Emma Raymond, who served during World War II as a truck driver in the Women’s Army Corps (WAC), and is also a parishioner at Our Lady of Lourdes.

“It is so beautiful,” Raymond said. “Veterans are often forgotten, but we did so much. It is nice to be honored in this special way.”

Father Jack Costello, Rector of Epiphany Cathedral in Venice, celebrated the Mass for Bishop Frank J. Dewane, who was unable to attend due to a commitment at the annual meeting of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. More than a dozen Priests and several Deacons joined Father Costello.

Noting that veterans served with faith in God and country, Father Costello said they gave of themselves unselfishly and trusted that they would be able to do the Will of God when called upon.

So many veterans served unselfishly through their Faith in God, literally giving a part of themselves that they will never get back, Father Costello continued. Approximately 19,000 veterans and their spouses are interred in the National Cemetery.

“Many would say that through their service they have been blessed by our Loving God in many different ways and would not change a thing,” Father concluded. “We must never forget what they did for each one of us and what they did to do God’s Will.”

Adding to the dignity and ceremony of the day were active and retired veterans, as well as the Fourth Degree Knights of Columbus who formed a Color Corps, and many other Knights who were there to support the veterans.

Veterans Day began as an informal celebration to mark the conclusion of World War I, before being designated as a national holiday in 1954 to honor all military men and women who have sacrificed so much in their service to this country.

The Sarasota National Cemetery celebration concluded with a procession, escorted by the Knights of Columbus Color Corps, to the nearby graves as those in attendance sang “God Bless America.” Priests, Deacons, and about 30 members of the Knights of Columbus Color Corps Honor Guard and all present, gathered in silent prayer before “Taps” was played on a bugle.

The Diocese of Venice coordinates the Catholic Mass at the cemetery with the support of the Knights of Columbus. One of the graves is that of Father Robert G. Tierney, a former assistant at St. Joseph Parish in Bradenton, who served in the U.S. Navy. Father Tierney died in 2006 and was one of the first people buried in the cemetery.

St. Mary Academy first Diocesan school to be STREAM certified

Posted on by Bob Reddy

By Christine Wyckoff – Special to the Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

After a thorough assessment and examination, St. Mary Academy in Sarasota was awarded the title of a certified STREAM (Science, Technology, Religion, Engineering, Arts and Mathematics) school.

St. Mary Academy is the first Catholic school in the Diocese of Venice, and the first ESE (Exceptional Student Education) school in the State of Florida, to earn this prestigious certification through the Florida Catholic Conference (FCC) and the National Council for Private School Education. The Academy joins just three other schools in the state with a STREAM title.

As a school serving students with special learning needs, St. Mary Academy realizes the value of a STREAM concept of learning, Principal Rebecca Reynolds said.

“With nearly 20 years of excellence in education, St. Mary Academy continues to offer its students a progressive education, affording them a strong foundation to ensure future success,” Reynolds said. “A STREAM curriculum model allows them to do just that.”

Dr. Ben Moore, Diocese Superintendent of Catholic Education, said the Diocese is proud of the administration, faculty and staff of St. Mary Academy for achieving the STREAM certification from the FCC.

“Such a designation is the culmination of years of preparation and professional commitment to this initiative,” Dr. Moore said. “The FCC has validated our schools’ unique ability to provide a balanced educational experience designed to prepare our students for the future while remaining grounded in our Catholic identity.”

A STREAM education is the collaborative blending of six concepts (Science, Technology, Religion, Engineering, Arts and Mathematics) through the platform of the Catholic Faith in an exploratory and inquiry-based learning environment. STREAM schools integrate Catholic identity into every aspect of the curriculum and promote a culture of innovation. STREAM lessons educate students for their future, make learning relevant, and emphasize interdisciplinary connections.

St. Mary Academy operates using a STREAM curriculum model. Teachers provide students with meaningful instruction and authentic assessments by using project-based learning, which provides their students with real world situations and applications. From kindergarten through Grade 8, the teachers at St. Mary Academy design units of study that challenge and empower students.

A recent STREAM unit of study titled “Tham Luang Cave Rescue,” encompassed all subject areas.  From science to art class, middle school students studied the progression of the cave rescue. Each student was assigned to a rescue team and planned accordingly. Rescue teams developed plans to feed, deliver medical attention, devise an escape route and secure life safety for everyone involved.

Students didn’t stop there. They continued their exploration in each class by: measuring distance in math class; calculating escape route times in technology class; researching amount of oxygen necessary in science class; creating mock caves in art class; developing overall escape plans in engineering; and discussing the value of preserving human life in religion class.

“It’s exciting to see the students so engaged in their learning,” said Kathy Wilde, STREAM Coordinator. “They ask higher level questions and seek the answers independently. After all, 21st century learners are problem solvers. It’s rewarding to see students so empowered to find solutions, both in and out of the classroom.”

St. Mary Academy offers a STREAM lab, vegetable garden, prayer garden, open fields, and the Zazarino Center/gymnasium as dynamic learning spaces, in addition to collaborative classrooms. Parents recognize the value and appreciate a STREAM curriculum model.

St. Mary Academy Home School Association President Jessica Alcala joyfully exclaimed that the STREAM foundation of the school is obvious.

“The faculty and staff, led by Mrs. Reynolds, continue to impress me with the way they include so much relevant learning across all subject areas” Alcala said. “It’s a new way of learning, and my son loves it.”

St. Mary Academy also takes careful consideration to differentiate instruction. The teachers accommodate the academic and developmental needs of their students in various ways. St. Mary Academy takes great pride in encouraging and fostering each child’s academic success, while maintaining a rigorous, developmentally appropriate curriculum.  St. Mary Academy students continue to thrive in a progressive academic environment, where they are faithful to God, inspired to serve, responsible for their actions, and engaged to learn.

For more information about St. Mary Academy, or to make a donation, please contact Connie Taft, Development Director, at ctaft@stmarysarasota.org.

Courage in Red Prayer Vigil Nov. 28

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Stand up for Faith and Religious Freedom

Staff Report – Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

The Diocese of Venice will join other Dioceses around the world for a “Courage in Red” Prayer Vigil at 5:30 p.m. Nov. 28 at Epiphany Cathedral, 310 Sarasota Street, Venice. This annual initiative of Aid to the Church in Need is designed to raise awareness for persecuted Christians.

“Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 5:10–12

This year, the Cathedral will be illuminated in red on Nov. 28, for an evening Prayer Vigil and everyone is encouraged to attend. This special campaign is being held as a symbolic gesture of solidarity – by wearing/lighting Churches in red (the color of the martyrs) – in remembering those who have been martyred for their faith. All are asked to stand in solidarity with our fellow Christians as they fight for religious freedom today.

In Diocesan Catholic Schools, the students will be encouraged to wear red, explained Dr. Ben Moore, Diocese Superintendent of Catholic Education. Throughout the week, age-appropriate lessons will be provided about the plight of persecuted Christians. Catholic High School students will also be shown the documentary “Christians in the Mirror.”

Additionally, the faithful are also encouraged to attend a daily Mass that day in place of a suffering Christian who cannot because they live in fear of practicing their Faith publicly.

Today, persecution of Christians is nearly as brutal and vicious as was experienced by Christians in the early Church. Many of our brothers and sisters in the Middle East and other regions are coming face to face with evil.

Some of the wounds of persecution are visible – machete scars to a young Christian’s neck in Sudan or the burn marks to a young girl’s face. Some attacks result in modern-day martyrs, like that of a priest in eastern Congo, shot in the head and killed inside his rectory. Or a Jesuit priest, shot twice and murdered in Syria, while protecting Christians trapped in an old monastery.

The Faith is targeted in many ways around the world. Christian practice and symbols are threatened in places like Pakistan, Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Egypt and Syria.  Persecution around the world has manifested itself through the centuries, but it is worse today than ever before.

Under the guidance of the Holy Father, Aid to the Church in Need provides pastoral and humanitarian assistance to the persecuted Church around the world.  For more than 67 years, the program has reached out to the suffering, the distressed and the poorest of the poor in over 145 countries. Each year, Aid to the Church in Need fulfills more than 5,000 projects through its spiritual and material aid programs. Its shared goal: To help strengthen the Church and keep the Faith alive.

All are encouraged to use the following hashtags #DOVCOURAGEINRED and #COURAGEINREDWITNESS.

Donor-Advised Funds

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Susan Laielli – Special to the Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

It’s difficult to imagine that with one simple phone call a person can donate to any number of their favorite Catholic, social service, and other pro-life causes such as Pregnancy Care Centers, abstinence programs, Catholic Schools, Catholic Charities and beyond, through the Catholic Community Foundation of Southwest Florida (CCFSF).

After investing in other foundations in Southwest Florida, philanthropists Janine Marrone, and her husband Steve, decided to place their hard-earned money into a Donor-Advised Fund (DAF) at the Catholic Community Foundation of Southwest Florida, where their Catholic and pro-life passions could prosper, and hopefully change hearts and minds along the way.

A Donor-Advised Fund is a charitable investment account for the sole purpose of supporting charitable organizations you care most about, while offering an immediate tax deduction. Donors make a charitable contribution to their fund and recommend grants from it over time to their favorite Catholic, pro-life or social service programs and ministries.

In the Marrone’s case, they advance many Catholic and pro-life missions, such as creating Luncheons4Life. They are assisted by many good people in Sarasota, Lee and Collier counties within the Diocese, each offering monthly luncheons in support of life. The luncheons, also held in Fort Lauderdale, Atlanta, Georgia, and Alton, Illinois, bring like-minded supporters of life together without politics, and with no cost or “ask” at the end.  Through their Donor-Advised Fund, the Marrone’s are able to raise awareness in hopes of bringing an end to abortion and offering healing to those who have had an abortion.

“The Donor-Advised Fund allows our contributions to be forwarded to Our Lady of Perpetual Help Retreat Center for the luncheons, or to our Parish, the Catholic Faith Appeal, and Catholic Schools,” said Janine Marrone, who was excited to open the first Donor-Advised Fund with the Catholic Community Foundation of Southwest Florida this year.

“We can also contribute to the Institute for Catholic Studies and Formation, Pregnancy Care Centers, and to Catholic Charities through this fund,” added Marrone, who was well-versed and experienced in donor-advised funds.

She approached the Catholic Community Foundation when she heard they were launching their own Donor-Advised Fund program that was more in alignment with her faith and values.

Funds with the Catholic Community Foundation are invested in socially responsible, Catholic-screened investments.  Distributions can only be made to Catholic, pro-life or social service agencies whose mission and services are in keeping with the teachings of the Church.

“Earlier in 2018, the Catholic Community Foundation Board approved the launch of our Donor-Advised Fund program in response to numerous requests from donors within the Diocese who were looking for a Catholic option,” said Michael Morse, Executive Director of the Catholic Community Foundation of Southwest Florida. “I was so blessed to work with the Marrone’s on the program’s launch.”

With the launch of this new program the CCFSW is now a full-service community foundation that can meet the needs of donors looking for a faith-based alternative for their giving. All Donor-Advised Funds, similar to all funds held by the Foundation, are governed by fund agreements signed by the donor, which specify how they may be used.

“With the recent changes to the tax laws, Donor-Advised Funds with the Catholic Community Foundation may be a great way to maximize your tax benefits this year and going forward,” added Morse.

Marrone exhibits much enthusiasm when she talks about charitable giving and making a difference, but she also is very active and engaged in the community, so there’s not a lot of time to waste.

“Working with the Foundation is easy, and with the Donor-Advised Fund it’s essentially one-stop-shopping, really,” said Marrone.

For more information on donor-advised funds or the Catholic Community Foundation, please contact Michael Morse at 941-441-1124.

Second wave of donated items delivered to Panhandle

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Staff Report – Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

The second delivery of items donated by the faithful of the Diocese of Venice has been delivered and distributed to those recovering from the aftermath of Hurricane Michael.

Deacon Henry deMena and Paul Unsworth of St. Agnes Parish helped deliver the supplies to St. Dominic Parish in Panama City on Nov. 2. There he spent the week helping to hand out needed supplies to people who are continuing to struggle to rebuild their lives nearly a month after the storm struck the Panhandle.

“The destruction is truly indescribable,” Deacon deMena said. “The number of homes that are damaged or destroyed is amazing. Entire strip malls turned to rubble. We saw boats on their side in the middle of roads (more than three weeks after the storm); trailer homes either destroyed or lying on their sides; trees that were snapped like twigs, etc.”

The emergency supplies were the result of a Diocese-wide appeal that showed a tremendous response of donated emergency items, including water, food and cleaning supplies.

Deacon deMena and a colleague spent the week at the distribution center for food, water, personal hygiene, pet food and many other items located at St. Dominic Parish. The center operated from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. and had a continuous stream of cars coming through.

“The needs are endless up there and yet everyone who came through the line were so upbeat and appreciative of what we were all doing for them,” the Deacon explained. “As the colder weather approaches people were looking for blankets since many of them are living in a partial home open to the outside.”

The distribution site is in the shadow of the Church, which had major damage. The rectory, parish hall and faith formation buildings were destroyed.

Everywhere he turned, Deacon deMena saw volunteers making a difference, working alongside Catholic Charities staff from across Florida and the nation being Jesus to the poor and downtrodden.

These students from St. John Neumann Catholic High School helped load this truck of hurricane relief supplies at the Catholic Charities Judy Sullivan Family Resource Center in Naples on Nov. 2. The supplies were delivered to the Florida Panhandle that weekend.

The first wave of supplies from the Diocese of Venice arrived in the Panhandle less than a week after Hurricane Michael struck on Oct. 10. The donations were then consolidated at the Judy Sullivan Family Resource Center of Catholic Charities in Naples.

Students from St. John Neumann Catholic High School in Naples helped load the truck deMena took of Panama City.

“I can’t list the many times we saw God’s hand in helping us,” Deacon deMena said of his time in Panama City. “This was a true example of how the Catholic Church works as a united front to care for ‘the least of my brothers.’”

Punta Gorda Youth Tweet the Holy Father

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Staff Report – Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

A simple exercise for a Parish youth group turned into an outpouring of heartfelt emotion about the Universal Church, their Faith and Pope Francis.

Rita J. Sheridan, Director of Youth Ministries at Sacred Heart Parish in Punta Gorda, organized her 6th-8th graders to compose messages – or Tweets – that would be sent to Pope Francis through his Twitter social media account.

Sheridan heard about other youth groups doing this exercise and believed it would be a good idea. The results were amazing.

“After I read each of them, I was so moved that I set up the Twitter account and sent them off to the Pope,” Sheridan said. “They really couldn’t believe I would actually do this!”

Sheridan was pleased with the thought and effort the students made during this project.

“It was a great exercise and the kids truly spoke from their hearts,” she said.

The following are just some of the Tweets created by the youth from Sacred Heart Parish in Punta Gorda:

  • “Dear Pope Francis – when I go to Church I feel safe against all evil on Earth. I honor you for religious freedom. I get connected to the Church when I pray and I am with my family.” – Nicholas
  • “Dear Pope Francis – I feel special at Church because I sing at Mass. It’s only me and three other girls. Almost all my family that goes to church at the 4 o’clock Mass helps in the Mass. Thank you for trying to stop the shootings. Love.” – Tristen
  • “Dear Pope Francis – My name is Aaron and I’d like to tell you that when I go to Church I feel connected to the Church. I appreciate your work. I’m connected to the Church because I love to learn about God. God bless you, Pope Francis.” – Aaron
  • “Dear Pope Francis – When my mother, brother and I walk into Church we feel welcomed by God. I truly follow what you stand for which is love, caring and having a beloved heart. I follow yours and God’s Word for these top three special things. I plan on serving in the U.S. Navy to protect these top three things including religious freedom so we can continue to follow God and follow his word in the future. Thank you for being the true head of our Christian Catholic religion. I truly follow you wholeheartedly… dearly loved and truly follower.” – no name provided
  • “Dear Pope Francis – As I walk into Church I feel welcomed. Along with many other emotions including the breaking of my religious solitude and the acceptance into God’s arms. I honor you because of your efforts and success in helping people into Christianity or accepting them for who they are no matter the religion or Faith of said person. I feel as if you connect me to the Church by showing me there is nothing to be afraid of as you and God accept me into your arms even if others don’t accept me for who I am. I like your approach on how you want to save the environment and how you unite people together to make a change. Thank you.” 8th grader – no name provided

To date, the youth have not received any responses from Pope Francis, but Sheridan explained that this is understandable as the Holy Father (or his staff) likely see countless messages each day.

Memorial Mass for Deacons held

Posted on by Bob Reddy

By Bob Reddy – Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

November is an appropriate time to remember those who have died, that they may someday be accepted into heaven.

For this reason, Bishop Frank J. Dewane invites the Permanent Deacons and their wives to participate in a Memorial Mass each year as a time to pray for, to honor, and to remember the Deacons and their wives who have passed away. The 2018 Mass was celebrated on Nov. 6 at Our Lady of Perpetual Help Retreat Center in Venice. Today, there are more than 50 Permanent Deacons, many seasonal, living and serving throughout the Diocese.

Bishop Dewane paid tribute to the Deacons for answering the call of the Lord in a precise way and took time to honor those who came before to ensure they are not forgotten.

“Being a Deacon is about building a spiritual life,” Bishop Dewane said. “It is an intentional aspect of discipleship. You go forward – with the support of your spouse – blessed by the Lord who provides the resources necessary so that you finish that call you were given.”

That call includes being representatives of the Living Church. Permanent Deacons serve as Ministers of Word, proclaiming the Gospel, preaching, and teaching in the name of the Church. They also baptize, lead the faithful in prayer, witness marriages, and conduct wake and funeral services. As ministers of Charity, Deacons are leaders in identifying the needs of others, then marshaling the resources to meet those needs.

The goal of the Memorial Mass is to bring attention to all of the Deacons who have served in the Diocese of Venice since its founding in 1984.

“Let us not just remember on a single day those who go before us,” Bishop Dewane concluded. “Let us not forget that example of strength they gave us before continuing on their journey toward the Lord.”

As part of this annual tradition, the names of those who have passed away during the previous year are solemnly read as a candle is lit in their honor. Included in the list of names were Deacon Edward McCarthy, Deacon Joseph Cirieco, Lillian Camacho and Miriam Horvath.

Deacon Frank Camacho said that the annual Mass serves as an opportunity for the Permanent Deacons of the Diocese, and their spouses, to take time out to reflect on those who have died in the most appropriate way through Mass and prayer.

 

Grandparents honored at Neumann

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Bob Reddy – Florida Catholic

11/15/2018

Grandparents, a vital link to the past – most importantly the Faith, were welcomed to St. John Neumann Catholic High School in Naples for a special celebration.

That celebration on Nov. 7 opened with a Mass celebrated by Bishop Frank J. Dewane as students sat with their grandparents in the Our Lady of the Angels Chapel. Afterwards, everyone went to the Student Life Center for a luncheon.

During the Mass, Bishop Dewane spoke about the wisdom and knowledge of the faith older people can share with the young.

“Those of you who are blessed to still have your grandparents in your lives must take advantage of this,” the Bishop said. “Learn from them. Learn about how the Lord has shaped their lives.”

The Bishop also encouraged the grandparents to impart their wisdom through love and tenderness. “You as grandparents are a connection to Jesus Christ that the young people need. You are the example for them to follow.”

Several grandparents, and their grandchildren, complimented the Bishop for speaking so clearly about their respective roles in the Church – one as mentor and example, the other as respectful listener and observer.

Following the Mass, one grandparent noted that he is proud his grandchildren attend a Catholic High School. “My grandson is getting the best education. I tried to pass the faith along to my own children and grandchildren. It is rewarding to see that lesson is being passed down to my grandchildren and enhanced here at St. John Neumann.”

Bereavement: Surviving the Holidays

Posted on by Bob Reddy

Bob Reddy – Florida Catholic

11/25/2018

The holidays can be a stressful time for everyone but more so for those who are grieving the loss of a loved one. The rush of memories can make it feel as if the loss is happening all over again.

To help the bereaved, the Office of Family Life offered three “There is Hope: Surviving the Holidays” workshops led by Deacon Henry deMena of St. Agnes Parish in Naples, who has extensive training experience as a bereavement counselor.

Deacon deMena tried to help the bereaved make sense out of what doesn’t make sense: grief. The workshops took place Nov. 13 at St. Leo the Great Parish in Bonita Springs, and Nov. 15 at Epiphany Cathedral in Venice and Incarnation Parish in Sarasota.

Deacon deMena spoke about how the grieving process is an emotional roller coaster and spiritually one can find peace at times and then find anger. None of this is unusual. While prayers can bring comfort, they cannot magically take pain away.

“As humans we might feel God has abandoned us when trying to deal with the loss of a loved one,” Deacon deMena said. “It’s OK, because God has broad shoulders. He can handle you being upset with Him. The more you can pray and talk to the Lord, the easier it will be to help Him find you. God wants to share His love and comfort with us.”

The holidays are difficult because anxiety and stress levels are running high for everyone. Anything that can be done to reduce the effort and stress of the season is recommended.

The first Thanksgiving or the first Christmas after a loss is a stark reminder for the bereaved that the deceased is no longer there in a specific and powerful way. Fortunately, as time passes the recovery for the bereaved from the holiday is quicker.

“You need to expect and accept the pain of the day,” Deacon deMena said of holidays. “Feel what you need to feel, not with others want you to feel.”

Deacon deMena offered a variety of suggestions on how to get through the holidays by planning ahead for any activity to help avoid surprises. One thing not to do during the holidays is pretending everything is the same or fine, or to not talk about the loved one as if they never existed. This actually is more painful for the bereaved.

Other topics included common grieving feelings and misunderstandings; bereaving time frames; holiday bereavement for children/teens; coping techniques; and the power of prayer.

Workshop attendees shared their own stories of grief and the challenge of dealing with well-intentioned friends and family who are offering advice.

One gentleman from Bonita Springs explained how he is trying to cope with the recent loss of his wife of more than 50 years. “There is a hole in my life. Thanksgiving and Christmas just seem so overwhelming.”

Deacon deMena stressed the need for the bereaved to express their emotions and not hide them. He suggested several ways to incorporate the memory of the lost loved one in some way at a gathering can overcome some difficulties friends or family might have when bringing up the deceased.

“Doing the holidays different is okay,” the Deacon said. “Things are not the same. There is no reason to act as if they are.”

Deacon DeMena will be holding an Hour of Remembrance Prayer Vigil at 7 p.m. on Dec. 12 at St. Agnes Parish Chapel, 7775 Vanderbilt Beach Road, Naples. This is an hour before the Lord in prayer and music for all who are suffering or grieving in any way.

For more information about bereavement counseling, please contact Deacon deMena at deaconhenry@stagnesnaples.org.

Training Session

For those who are interested in becoming a Parish bereavement volunteer, the Diocese Office of Family Life is hosting a training called “There is Hope: Bereavement Training.” This will focus on training parish bereavement volunteers and those who speak with the bereaved and is not a workshop to help someone who has recently lost a loved one.  Deacon deMena holds a Master’s Degree in Counseling with extensive training and experience in Bereavement. The training will be held Jan. 24-25, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., both days, at St. Ann Parish, 985 3rd St. S., Naples. The cost is $25 per person which includes lunch for both days and materials.  More information can be found at www.dioceseofvenice.org/calendar  The registration link is: https://dioceseofvenice.regfox.com/bereavement-training-jan2019  and please register by January 21.

 

 

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